alive?

if i drink all bloody blames

still i will mourn to reprieve, 

if i cede my concurrent claims

but i will die leaving what i achieve. 

if i assure the best time 

but i will be the last to arrive, 

if i sense i'm upto my prime

still i will opt for the trough to dive. 

if i absorb transparent torture

yet i need more skins to aggrieve, 

if i access the fucking forger 

but i will always fail to recognize. 

if i leap the next breath

then i will look more alive, 

if i hault at the least depth

still i will wish not to survive. 

-chetna 🌻